Letting Go of Needing Others to Understand- Navigating Chronic Illness

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Last week, I got side blasted. In your face personal challenge on my own health care choices, care of my family, and just general way of my being. From family. Not fun. Not awesome. And I'm grateful for it.

If you've been faced with tough choices regarding your health (or parenting, or care for a parent, or educational choice, or was ever self treating a common cold), there is someone, somewhere that knows how you could do it better.

You know what you need to do...

If you'd just stop...

My cousin Bob's wife has a friend who totally cured her ____ with just____. I gave her your phone number.

And I'm so freakin' excited about how I reacted! Let me re-word that- I didn't react. I calmly chose how to act in response. Totally high fivin' myself right now just thinking about it. After what seemed like 20 minutes of trying to calmly acknowledge concerns and criticisms, I finally said,

"I have let go of the need for you to understand. If you understood, that would mean you had this same dis-ease and I wouldn't wish that for you."

Bam. Totally. Changes. Everything.

If asked, I will gladly share what's working and what's not. Medical studies, gut health and food choices, books, bloggers, and woo-woo theorists with family and strangers. 

If asked, I will listen with an open heart to concerns, fears, stories of healing... and magazine clippings.

But I no longer feel any need to breathlessly explain or defend. And, friends, it's a pretty awesome feeling.

My next post will have a handy dandy list of kind and hopefully neutralizing replies to very common things people say...but really shouldn't. 

First comes letting go. Of attachment to what others do with the information you share, of their feelings or fears, of their choices.

Then you can respond with love for yourself and for them.

Have you ever felt under attack for your choices? How did you handle it? What works for you?

xo,

Amy